Dennis Kucinich is estimated to be 5' 7'' or 5' 8''. His wife Elizabeth Harper Kucinich stands 6 feet tall and she's a natural redhead according to Wikipedia. Elizabeth is also more than 30 years younger than her candidate husband.

Even if he looses the nomination (which he will), this makes him a winner in my book... my book about old guys who rob the cradle. I don't read it often. It's a little over-the-top in my book... my book of principles.

Here's a pretty funny video (from the David Letterman program) I found while researching fellow candidate Dennis (The Menace) Kucinich. The theme of "no audio needed" is a bit ironic, considering that Kucinich has yet to make a single statement on the importance of breakfast.



On a related note, a couple days ago I became intrigued that Kucinich had a tall, attractive and much younger wife. It surfaces now that Kucinich married the handsome redhead at Shirley MacLaine's house with Sean Penn in attendance.


On a completely unrelated note, check out Cinnamon Rolls 101 for a very good picture tutorial on making cinnamon rolls from "The Pioneer Woman Cooks".

On December 11, 1990, the Senate held hearings to probe the problem of violence against women. It turns out the problem is a two-way street. Senator Joe Bidden gets beat up by his own sister.

To quote Senator Biden, "In my house, being raised with a sister and three brothers, there was an absolute — it was a nuclear sanction, if under any circumstances, for any reason, no matter how justified, even self-defense — if you ever touched your sister, not figuratively, literally. My sister, who is my best friend, my campaign manager, my confidante, grew up with absolute impunity in our household. And I have the bruises to prove it. I mean that sincerely. I am not exaggerating when I say that."

In 2007, the candidate's sister (Valerie Biden Owens) is the National Chair of the Biden for President Campaign. At this writing, there is no indication whether or not Joe Biden is being beat up by his new campaign manager, Luis Navarro.

Poor Mr. Gravel. He was so great in the April Democratic debates. (Watch it here if you don't believe me.) His feisty, direct responses made him seem like a real man of the people, albeit a somewhat crazy man of the people. By contrast, the other candidates seemed like skipping records... repeating the same old lines in the their same old notch-above-monotone speech patterns.

Now comes this video. Instead of capitalizing on his cut-the-bull image, the Gravel Campaign seems to be trying to get attention from Mike's far less interesting persona as "the crazy candidate".

On MSNBC today, Mr. Gravel said, "Throw a rock in the water... you see ripples... well that of course if what a campaign is all about... now while (people) don't understand this... which is hilarious... this is a metaphor..." Mr. Gravel did three takes of the staring and eventual rock throwing scene.

For as insane as this video may be... do you know what's more insane... skipping breakfast. Research compiled on MrBreakfast.com suggests that people who skip breakfast or treat it as a snack or mini-meal are more likely to gain weight (be unattractive) and perform worse at school and work than those who take breakfast seriously.

Presidential Candidate Tommy Thompson seems like a real stiff, right? He's the guy in the Republican debates with the deep voice... the one who seems like he doesn't have a sense of humor. You know... he's one of the five guys you always forget when you try to remember who's running for President. A real square? Not entirely true.

An American highway... the roar of an engine! A man in a vest and leather pants blazes through the summer heat. The wind sweeps his flowing, aging hair. His revs his Harley one more time. He's gone. Meet the other Tommy Thomspon - Sturgis Motorcycle Museum & Hall of Fame Inductee 2002.

The tribute to Thompson on the Motorcycle Museum's website calls him, "The obvious ‘natural’ for the (Hall of Fame)... an avid supporter of motorcyclists... (he worked to) make certain anti-motorcycle legislation was kept off the books.... (he made) the Governor’s Motorcycle Tour an annual event.... Secretary Thompson frequently expresses his love of Wisconsin and motorcycling by saying, 'Wisconsin, where eagles soar and Harley’s roar.'"

Before now, I only knew him as the man who spent four years as the Secretary of Health and Human Services and did nothing to further the Importance of Breakfast in America. Now I know him as a motorcycle madman... who did nothing to further the Importance of Breakfast in America.

Bikers knew the other side of Tommy Thompson all along. To quote the bikers in the video below, "(Thompson is) a true biker... a true friend of bikers.... (he) Isn't just a biker... (he) wants to get rid of some of the crap going around...."

Republican Presidential candidate Jim Gilmore has temporarily halted campaign appearances due to a partially detached retina. The former Virginia Governor underwent emergency eye surgery Friday to repair the detachment.

Those following the 2008 race for President may better know Jim Gilmore as "Jim Who?" or "Who's that guy?" The fact that Gilmore has yet to receive significant attention leads many to wonder if his so-called "detached retina" is anything more than a cheap campaign ploy.

Certainly, an eye patch would garner more attention for Gilmore. A pirate-esque appearance might make him look tougher on issues and separate him from the crowd of candidates without eye patches.

An eye patch could also be a boon to his speech writers, offering such quips as "I may not be able to see out of my right eye, but I can see this bill is wrong" or "Healthcare reform... look at my eye."

A retinal detachment occurs when the retina is pulled away from its normal position in the back of the eye. It is most often caused by an injury to the eye or the face. Nearsighted people are more prone to retinal detachment because they have longer eyeballs with thinner retinas. Retinal detachment causes blurred vision and a terrible case of "red eye". If left untreated, blindness could result.

Jim Gilmore has yet to offer a policy on the Importance of Breakfast in America.

And the award for "worst use of a Hispanic stereotype since the drunken mice of the Speedy Gonzales cartoons" goes to.... Mike Huckabee.

The above video is from the N.G.A. Healthy America Forum (February 26, 2006 - Washington, DC). The footage shows the former Governor of Arkansas discussing healthy lifestyles with the Sesame Street characters Elmo and Rosita.

The character Rosita was first introduced in 1993 when the PBS series explored what was "around the corner" from Sesame Street. Rosita hails from Mexico and drifts back and forth between speaking English and Spanish.

Unseen here but prevalent on the television show is the fact that Rosita likes to play guitar - a positive stereotype akin to the statement that "all Asians carry calculators".

Rosita is an ugly green monster. Her full name is Rosita La Monstrua de las Cuevas or "Monster of the Caves".

It is also interesting to note that Candidate Huckabee appears to be reading notes from the ledge of the puppet stand. Also, consider the insanity that there are no children in the audience.

Now I, for one, don't consider Mexicans to be monsters... especially Mexican women. Mexican people deserve the same respect as their lighter-skinned brothers. I don't see the world in terms of red and green. "Around the corner" from my house, Mexicans don't play guitar and have comical names. My Mexican neighbors are businessmen. My Mexican neighbors are families. No Mr. Huckabee... my Mexican neighbors are not monsters. I will not vote for you sir. I will vote for me. Vote For Breakfast 2008!

Presidential candidate Mr Breakfast will continue to point out the foibles and goofs all the candidates (regardless of party) until they reveal a position on the importance of breakfast.

Please return in the coming weeks for video footage of Mike Huckabee when he was fat.

Yesterday, it was reported that Bill Richardson belted a photographer with a baseball while making a campaign appearance in Dyersville, Iowa.

Richardson was touring the site of the 1989 Kevin Costner baseball film “Field of Dreams.” After playing catch with a couple locals, the Democratic Presidential Candidate stepped up to the plate to hit a few balls.

Whack! A line drive into right field! Watch out!

Richardson's first hit was a line drive directly into the upper thigh of a photographer.

“I hit a photographer," said the Democratic Presidential Candidate, "I am a pull hitter. He should have gotten out of the way.”

Richardson may have also inadvertently whacked open a can of worms (also known as a bucket of lies).

This morning, many people will search the internet for "Bill Richardson" and "Baseball". They'll get more than they expect.

It turns out that Bill Richardson falsely claimed he had been drafted by the Kansas City Athletics baseball team. The false credential appeared in the biography he used in his campaign for Congress in 1982. It was also mentioned in a White House news release in 1997.

In November 2005, an investigation by the Albuquerque Journal found no record of Richardson being drafted by the Athletics or any other team.

Richardson made the following statement when the story broke, "After being notified of the situation and after researching the matter... I came to the conclusion that I was not drafted by the A's."

As this story is nearly impossible to believe, I offer you the following news-report as verification:



Sources: CNN, The Associated Press

Presidential Candidate Mr Breakfast will continue to point out the foibles and goofs of all the candidates (regardless of party) until they reveal a position on the importance of breakfast.

Just as we predicted... former Virginia Governor Jim Gilmore announced he has dropped out of the Presidential race. He released an official statement of resignation on Saturday, July 14th... 11 days after VoteForBreakfast.com ran the story "Jim Gilmore Drops Out Of The Race (For Now)". In his statement, Gilmore pointed to his frustration with the Presidential nomination process as a contributing factor for his departure, saying "I have come to believe that it takes more than a positive vision for our nation’s future to successfully compete for the Presidency."

The statement made no reference to the fact Gilmore's latest financial disclosure report showed him with only $90,000 in cash on hand... enough money to buy 150 iPhones or 72 haircuts for John Edwards*.

A desire to spend more time with his family may have also played a role in his decision. That was the excuse he used in 2001 when he resigned as the chair of the Republican National Committee.

His statement went on to read, "I will be actively looking for other opportunities to continue in public service in the Commonwealth of Virginia."

While he didn't specify a precise sector of public service, the following government jobs are currently available at Jobs.Virginia.Gov:

• Food Service Worker - Southwestern Virginia Mental Health Institute
• Help Desk Supervisor - University of Virginia
• Art Model (Life) - Northern Virginia Community College
• Banquet Server / Bartender - Christopher Newport University
• Gift Shop Clerk - Jamestown-Yorktown Foundation

During his 6-month bid to be President, Jim Gilmore never once mentioned the importance of breakfast.

Sources: CNN; Dallas / Fort Worth Channel 11, New York Times


* Candidate John Edwards paid Hairstylist Joseph Torrenueva $1,200 for a single haircut in 2004.


Presidential Candidate Mr Breakfast will continue to point out the foibles and goofs of all the candidates (regardless of party) until they reveal a position on the importance of breakfast.

"If you've ever been at a concert with Lynyrd Skynyrd, I'm sure you heard it before..."

On July 7, 2007, Presidential Candidate and Arkansas Governor Mike Huckabee took the stage in Nashua, NH to preform a scorching rendition of the Southern rock anthem "Free Bird" with his band Capitol Offense. The band is comprised of the Governor (bass), members of his staff (plus one family member) and an investment banker (rhythm guitar). The band is billed on their MySpace page as "The Hardest Working Band in Politics!"

There was an uncomfortable feeling in the air as the band played the already down-beat opening at a painfully sleepy tempo. But when Arkansas Family Life Issues Liason Chris Pyle's drums and Presidential Candidate Huckabee's bass kicked into overdrive midway though the song, there was no question that this band rocked!

The response from the crowd was energetic and positive, even though a few more astute Huckabee supporters noticed irony in the lyrics.

"If I leave here tomorrow... will you still remember me?"

Yes, Presidential Candidate Huckabee, we will remember you. Long after you've run out of money and left the race, we will remember how you rocked. We'll remember how you brought Southern rock to New Hampshire and shook the earth with your explosive bass riffs. We'll remember how, when you were fat, you sat in a chair at your state's capitol and broke it to bits. And how you brought a rock-and-roll, just-do-it attitude to dieting and emerged as a thinner, healthier Huckabee. Yes, we will remember you and we will miss you when you're gone. Rock on Governor. Rock on.


Presidential Candidate Mr Breakfast will continue to point out the foibles, goofs and bands of all the candidates (regardless of party) until they reveal a position on the importance of breakfast.

This just in...

Tom Tancredo looks exactly like Pauly Shore.

Tom Tancredo is a member of the U.S. House of Representatives and a Republican Candidate for President. Pauly Shore was a comedian in the eighties and early nineties before his particular brand of wacky-guy, funny-accent humor fell out of vogue with modern audiences.

In other Tom Tancredo news, our crack reporters found the candidate eating breakfast in Pleasantville, Iowa yesterday morning. (Actually, I found a picture and a little blurb on his website). Tancredo shared coffee and muffins with townsfolk at a restaurant called The Smokey Row.

If you'd like to check out Pauly Shore, he'll be performing on November 7th at the Holiday Inn in Salina, Kansas. See his website for more details.


Presidential Candidate Mr Breakfast will continue to point out the foibles and goofs (and strange resemblances to "celebrities") of all the candidates (regardless of party) until they reveal a position on the importance of breakfast.

After finishing in 6th place in an Iowa Straw Poll this weekend, former Wisconsin Governor Tommy Thompson has dropped out of the race for President.

A straw poll refers to any informal poll. The name comes from the old practice of holding up a piece of straw to determine which way the wind blows.

"I have no regrets about running," said Tommy Thompson, "I respect the decision of the voters."

"They came out and voted. I didn't do well. You play the game -- some people win, some people lose," Thompson added, "I happened to be on the losing end this time. I have no regrets."

"My campaign was completely shocked. We absolutely thought we were coming in second... Something happened between the 50-yard line and the goal line. They pulled a reverse on us and we didn't see it coming."

In light of Thompson's departure from the race, VoteForBreakfast.com has scrapped plans for an expose on the former Governor. Insiders reveal that the story dealt with Thompson's facial expressions and how it often looked like the former candidate was "farting" or making "farting noises" by trapping air between his cheeks and gums.

Mr. Thompson intends to return to the "private sector" where he was working as a senior partner in a law firm prior to his candidacy.

For more information, please see "The Other Side Of Tommy Thompson".

On January 8, 2007, Presidential Candidate Dennis Kucinich stunned a crowd during a speech at the 10th Annual Wall Street Project Conference at the Sheraton New York. He had just finished telling the audience that he was "a product of the city" and that he'd lived in several apartments during his youth. He then segued into a discussion on "pulling oneself up by bootstraps" - at which time, he broke into several bars of the classic county gem, "Sixteen Tons" - a song about coal mining.

"Sixteen Tons" was written in 1947 by country singer Merle Travis. It was made popular in 1955 when it became a surprise hit for Tennessee Ernie Ford (see the video below).

While the coal mining song doesn't really fit the creepy vocal stylings of "Product-Of-The-City" Kucinich, one line is particularly apropos to his on-going campaign:

"Another day older and deeper in debt."

Kucinich currently ranks last among Democrats in most national polls.

For a great rendition of "Sixteen Tons", click here to see Johnny Cash sing it with an 80's-style mustache.

What's the matter with Chris Dodd?

When you look at the stage during a 2007 Democratic Presidential debate... among the "hip" younger candidates and eccentric weirdoes... there's a seemingly-stodgy white-haired man. We rarely remember what he had to say. We just remember the kind-of-boring guy. The "fuddy-duddy", or to coin a phrase... the "fuddy-DODDy".

This is NOT the real Chris Dodd. Beneath that family-friendly white hair is the mind of a playboy, filled with drunken memories of romantic conquests.

GQ Magazine reported on Chris Dodd the player in 1990. An article by Michael Kelly recalled Dodd doing a "Mexican hat dance" at a French Restaurant near his office. He was drinking with fellow Democrat Ted Kennedy. According to the article, Kennedy saw a framed picture of Chris Dodd on the wall. He shouted, "Who's that guy?" and then ripped the picture off the wall and smashed it to the ground. Laughing, Dodd located a picture of Kennedy and danced on it.

The article doesn't reveal whether or not the two men picked up hot women that evening. But there's a good chance they did. According to the Hartford Courant, Dodd and Kennedy held the reputation in Washington as the “Playboys of the Western World.”

Dodd has scored some fine women in his time. Take for instance, Bianca Jagger, former wife of The Rolling Stones' Mick Jagger. In today's world, dating the jet-seting, party-going Jagger would be akin to having sex with an older Paris Hilton.

And it gets better...

In 1977, young boys the world over began to drool over a cute young space princess named Princess Leia. In 1983, those boys had become men. The third film in the Star Wars trilogy was just released and the cover of Rolling Stone magazine featured an older, sexier Princess Leia in a golden space bikini. The closest most men could get to the beautiful princess was a few magic moments with that magazine cover. But not Chris Dodd... he dated Princess Leia. The New York Times described Dodd's relationship with actress Carrie Fisher as a "courtship".

Of the relationship now, Dodd will only say "A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away.” (The Kansas City Star June 22, 2007)

And this - in the near-words of Yoda - is why he will fail. President... will he be not.

Americans aren't stupid. We could look in the televised eyes of our last two Presidents and see that they were scoundrels. We like scoundrels. It takes time management skills to be a success and still find time to get into trouble.

But Chris Dodd isn't showing us the "interesting Chris Dodd". He's backwards fronting. Why?

I have a theory. Stay with me. Carrie Fisher was once married to singer Paul Simon (1983-1984). She then married CAA agent Bryan Lourd. That relationship ended when Lourd left Fisher for a man. Now it's 2007 and Chris Dodd, Fisher's former love interest, is carrying on with Fisher's first husband, Paul Simon. According to WMUR Channel 9 in New Hampshire, Dodd is teaming up with the singer for a bus tour through Iowa. And there's more to the Simon/Dodd affair. On March 23, 2007, Paul Simon donated $2,300 to Chris Dodd For President Inc..

Now, I'm not saying that Chis Dodd is gay. I'm just saying he has yet to provide a position on the importance of breakfast.

Presidential candidate Mr Breakfast will continue to point out the foibles and goofs of all the candidates (regardless of party) until they reveal a position on the importance of breakfast.

I wish I could take credit for this discovery, but all credit goes to the Richardson campaign. Someone named "Steve Nash" posted an image in the Friend's Comments of Richardson's MySpace page showing the resemblance of Bill R. to semi-famous dwarf actor Deep Roy.

The 52-inch Deep Roy hails from Nairobi, Kenya. He's credited on IMDB as being an actor, stuntman and puppeteer. Some of his notable film appearances include The Return Of The Jedi, Planet Of The Apes and Charlie And The Chocolate Factory.

Personally, I'm very thankful to Bill Richardson without whom I may have never know there was a dwarf actor named Deep Roy. Thanks Bill.

Incidentally, right now Deep Roy has a 70% greater chance of becoming President than Bill Richardson.

...until BREAKFAST saved his life!

In 2002, Presidential candidate Mike Huckabee weighted 280 pounds. Climbing a flight of stairs would leave him panting and sweating like a pig. He could barely fit his large butt into seats in airplanes and theaters. He once sat in an antique chair at the state Capitol and it collapsed.

But there was nothing funny about the effects of obesity on his health. The Republican candidate was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes. He experienced chest pains and feared heart disease. Physicians told him that he would not live more than ten years if he did not lose weight.

Facing certain death, "The Huckster" went on a diet. According to the New York Times, "it was as if he simply unzipped a fat suit and stepped out." In the course of a year, the Governor lost over 100 pounds.

How did he do it? He began to eat right, eliminating almost all junk food. His diet consisted of many small meals each day. He got serious about exercise and even ran the New York City Marathon in 2006. But there was something else.

In a live 2005 internet chat with Newsweek readers, Mick Huckabee said, "NEVER skip breakfast... I cook my own breakfast each day."

The scientific community has known the weight loss properties of breakfast for some time. Researchers from the National Weight Control Registry found that eating breakfast every day was a weight control strategy for 78% of successful dieters.

According to a Harvard study, people who miss breakfast are four times more likely than others to become obese.

Mike Huckabee knows first-hand what breakfast can do. So the question remains: when will he announce a policy on the importance of breakfast? When will he share his secret weight loss weapon with the world?

According to independent candidate for President, Mr Breakfast, "I don't dig his politics, but I like his ideas on nutrition."

Sources: Seattle Times (6/2/05), Newsweek (5/10/05), Wikipedia